Ina Teves, Organizational Development Consultant

Ina Teves is an organizational development consultant with a change management firm dedicated to making a difference wherever it goes by journeying with the client through the entire process of organizational transformation. Email your questions to ina.b.teves@gmail.com.

I have many choices but I can’t decide to do with my career. Help!

Madam,

First of all I want to greet you a pleasant day. I am a fresh graduate of Civil Engineering. I am 20 years old and a licensed Civil Engineer in the Philippines. I am currently residing here with my father in Dubai, UAE. I am aiming to finish a Doctor's degree before I turn thirty. I am also aiming that I can have my own home, even a condo will do, in that span of time.

Ma'am, my problem is this – I cannot start my career because I am confused to where I will start it. I do not know what I want with my career. When I was still in the Philippines, I could have started my career as a field cost engineer with a large Philippine real estate development company by 15th of February this year. But I refused to take the job offer because my father said to me that I should wait because he will take me to Dubai. That's why I was very disappointed when I went to the cooperative that supplies the manpower to the local company – they told me that I was the top choice for the position. I felt very sad with what had happened to think that it would have been a very good company to start my career. I was even advised that I might be blacklisted because of what had happened.

After some days, I went out together with my friends for job hunting. We went to different construction companies and passed our resumes. I was able to take some of their written examinations. And I waited for some days for a response.

Unexpectedly, I was booked on a flight to Dubai by 14th of March. Also, unexpectedly, I was able to receive a call from another large local company (where I took an examination). They told me that I was scheduled for an interview. I went there with the purpose of telling them that I'll be leaving the country by March 14. But the interview went on which were general questions and technical questions. Days passed after the interview, and I again got a call and the HR congratulated me that I got the job. I said to her that I will be leaving the country the day after. She even requested me to go to their office. Here I was again---I went to their office to tell them personally that I could not accept their offer. Again, I went home disappointed knowing that there is no job that is waiting for me in Dubai.

The day of my departure came and I am here now in UAE – jobless for more than a month already. I have applied to different companies, and there was no response until the other day. I was able to have an interview with a scaffolding and trading company. The secretary is a Filipino and she told me that the CEO would hire me as a trainee. But I cannot decide if I will accept the offer because the salary is only AED 2500 equivalent to about 32000 Php although it is course-related. It is below what other Filipino are getting here. I am actually not after the salary, but I am thinking that "nandito na naman ako eh di dapat mataas na ang sweldo” (Since I’m already here, I might as well earn a good salary). I do not know if that is a valid reason for me not to take the job.

Then I received an e-mail yesterday inviting me for a written examination at a prestigious airline group and the position that is offered is Flight Analysis Specialist trainee. It is an out-of-course job but what makes me consider  it is the name of the company and the salary that I will be getting. The salary would be about AED 5500 + benefits like plane ticket discounts and insurance that is almost equivalent to PHP80,000 or more per month. But I'm afraid that my career might not grow as a Civil Engineer if I take a job like this.

Here in Dubai, I still receive some text messages and e-mail requests for an interview and exam from some companies in the Philippines. I beginning to feel disappointed and that I am only wasting my time here in Dubai. I hope, madam, that you could help me with my problem. Please guide me with the decisions that I would make in the near future. Because my visa will expire by 15 May.

Some things are bothering me. Like if I went back to the Philippines, the employers may have the impression that I am a lazy man because I don't have a job for almost a year now. Also, I might get dumped because there will be a new batch Civil Engineers. Another one is that our lower batch in college will be graduating in the next three months and this  might hurt my ego and pride. My father already bought things for me like the printer etc. My  21st birthday and my mom’s  50th birthday are approaching and these are important for me. I can not bring her here because no one will take care of my niece and our house back there in the Philippines.

What should I do? Should I go back to the Philippines or pursue a career here? Should I choose a high paying but out-of -course job or a low paying but course-related job? What should I tell my dad so that I will not hurt his feelings and he will not get angry with me if I do decide to go back to the Philippines?

Ma'am, I hope that I could get a response from you. Thank you very much for spending your time reading my letter.


Sincerely yours,

Jericho

Dear Jericho,

You have many fears and your fears are preventing you from making the right decision.  You also seem to be engaged in a battle with your father for control over your personal and professional future. You want your own life, yet you are afraid of displeasing him.

So, first things first.

Review the goals you set for yourself – you said you wanted to have your doctorate in Engineering by age 30, plus a condo unit, if not your own home. I sense from your letter that you would rather stay on the engineering track.  Weigh what is more important to you – the condo unit or a career.  You can get the condo unit with a job from the airline company but would that fulfill the longing you have for an engineering career? Will the condo unit be the proper symbol of the fulfillment of all that you could be?  I have an uncle who also works in the Middle East, and he started at a low-level, low-paying job despite his CPA credentials and experience. His employers, however, saw what he could do and began to give him more and more responsibilities – and better pay.  You have to start somewhere whether here or abroad.

You are too young to have these words in your vocabulary – what if, should have, could have, would have.  Just do it!  Life has its risks.  Everything has consequences - some good, some bad. 

The full measure of an adult lies in his ability to move towards his goal using all his gifts, take calculated risks, pick himself up if he falls, review his actions, and reorient his life’s direction.  

Decide whether you still want to stay in the Middle East or not. You should be the one to decide.  Deciding by default is not deciding at all.  You default by letting circumstances decide for you – your father’s displeasure, your other family members whom you miss, the influx of new graduates, what other companies will say, your visa expiration date. There is much freedom to be gained from making a decision.  Your next steps will be clearer to you, even what to say at interviews. You will be able to see which opportunities are aligned with your decision and weigh their value.

Now, to practical matters. 

You fear that companies will think you are a lazy man because you did not work for a year – but you do not know this for a fact.

Fact - many local companies have a hard time looking for engineers of any kind.  

Fact – many engineers leave for opportunities abroad.

Fact - you can still do something about it.  One option is to get that engineering job in Dubai, however low-paying. What you will learn in terms of experience is invaluable – how to get along with superiors and peers in a different culture, how to work in a corporate set-up or in an organization, how to handle professional challenges.  You may also discover how you could apply your new knowledge to Philippine contexts. 

Another option is to return to the Philippines.  You could always say that you did not find suitable opportunities for an engineering career in Dubai.   You must, however, be willing to start somewhere.  Smart companies always are on the lookout for talent they could develop.  It is cheaper for them to keep good people than to continue recruiting and training new ones. So be one of the good people they would want to keep.

As for your struggles with your father, he probably just wants the best for you, and seeing that you could not make a decision or are unwilling to make one and stand by it, he makes it for you.  He may just let go, you know, once you decide and show that you want to make it on your own.